Greatest Gift of All
As you frantically shop for gifts you will give this year to those you care about, consider what gifts you will give yourself. I am not suggesting anything in the store or online. I am suggesting you add in some self-care this season. The winter season and holidays are a time of reflection, and this can tempt us to judge ourselves and our performance from the prior year. “Did I reach the goals I had laid out for myself?” “Did I get that promotion? Did I lose the weight? Did I put money away like I had planned?” Be gentle in your adjudication. Feeling guilt or some remorse for personal failures is normal and productive if used as motivation for us to learn and modify our behaviors. Feeling shame is not productive, as shame is feeling negative about who we are, not what we did. As Brene Brown so brilliantly writes, “shame is the fear of not being worthy of connection and belonging”. So, use your mistakes and failures as lessons and motivation to try something new but beware of feeling shame, because we are all worthy of connection and we all belong here.